Maybe I am a little slow but I do realised that most of my friends have since stopped to blog about themselves.
The reason why I am still writing is not because i am expecting audiences (lol) but rather, it has become my personal healing entity. A place where I have to filter my thoughts before input can be extremely therapeutic to me. Even if the things i wrote contained mainly sad emotion, the will to continue remains unwavered. :)
You see....
Being an Uni student in a competitive school really affects my mood drastically. I noticed it. Times changed, and for me, i think i have changed too; flux according to circumstances. Unfortunately, i cannot seem to get "well" in this rat race, and the more I try to unacknowledged those unpleasant struggles, the more insecure I get. I understand that i should face it like a warrior or embrace with maturity, however it is often easy to say than done.
... Sometimes, whenever i think of those tears shed for my struggles, i felt like a loser, so imcompetent. This is not to say that i am expecting a smooth sailing life but the path which i have chose to walk hurts so much that the thought of giving all up becomes so vulnerable. Perhaps others had an even painful experience compared to mine but this is my honest feelings about myself - no pretence - my truest 心情。
Although it is too late to talk about regrets, i shall not and will not deny that uni has indeed brought another side of me; thus preparing me for the next chapter of my life.
Oh well, suck it up.
ohh and i forgot to mention..... %&%@*&&$(@*#(
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